


Attack on Titan: Red Swan

by taylormaede



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Canon Universe, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Fanfiction, Multi, OC Story, Original Characters - Freeform, Self Insert, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:07:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28207305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taylormaede/pseuds/taylormaede
Summary: With humanity on the brink of extinction, a young cadet, Taylor Schuyler, pursues her dreams to get a taste of the freedom and follow the dreams her father died to reach. While battling to remain strong enough to stay in the military, her brother, Nathaneal tries to encourage her not to join the scouts. However, she soon meets a boy with big ambitions and dreams like her father. This boy pushes Taylor to her limit and helps her to become a better soldier. Will this cadet she meets give her the strength to continue the fight, or will Taylor take her brother’s advice and give up before she is killed?
Relationships: Eren Yeager/Original Character(s), Eren Yeager/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Attack on Titan: Red Swan

_Trost District. 844._

Within the town of Trost stood a small family-owned bakery run by the Schuyler family. The owner, a hardworking young woman named Miriam Schuyler and mother of four—an eldest son at eleven, a second oldest daughter at ten, and a pair of toddler twins—was prepping to close up shop early for the day to prepare for the day her husband and friend would be stopping by for a feast during their day off, the day before another expedition outside the wall. It wasn’t easy being a woman at Miriam’s age having to care for four rambunctious children, running a business and often having that uneasiness of knowing or not knowing if today would be the day Dawson’s comrades would show up at her doorstep with the news that he had perished; yet despite the many hardships throughout the years, they have managed to get through any obstacles that came their way.

That August evening, Miriam had just finished serving her last customer for the day, and her eldest children were finishing up with their side duties as well as shifting their turns watching the twins until closing time; since it was Saturday, the shop would close earlier than it would during the week, and since this was a big day for the Schuylers to see family, they often closed early. The brother and sister rushed to finish early so they could have just enough time to go into town and spend time with their friends and make it back in time to help with mother prep dinner for the evening. 

“You two be careful now,” Miriam reminded them once more as her son excitedly dashed out the door. “And make sure you keep a close eye on your sister, Nathanael.”

“Don’t worry, Ma, I will,” Nathanael called out, putting his cap on his head. He stopped and turned back to the building. “Come on, Taylor, we can’t keep them waiting!”

“I’m coming!” Taylor rolled up her pouch containing her drawing materials and stuffed that and her journal into her satchel following her brother outside.

“Have fun, you two. Remember to be back by sunset.” Miriam waved off her children, a gentle smile upon her face as they waved back into town. 

“Do you always need to carry that old thing around?” Nathanael asked, gently nudging his sister.

“Yeah. Sometimes inspiration just hits at random times and I’d want to get it on paper before it disappears from my head.” Taylor gripped her satchel tight as though her life depended on it.

“How poetic.” Nathanael chuckled as he ruffled Taylor’s light brown hair. He meant no malice behind it; in fact, he was rather impressed at her artistic abilities for her age. Even if a large majority of them were scribbled nonsense making shapes that resembled people, animals, or objects, with time he could see her skill improving much further. 

The city was still a bit crowded even around this time, so Nathanael made sure to keep Taylor close to not lose sight of her, especially when he considered the fact that she was known to space out and wander off elsewhere. 

“All right, where is that place they said to meet again?” Nathanael looked around for the marketplace for any sign of their friends.

Taylor looked around, observing her surroundings until she spotted a redheaded girl and a larger boy around both her and Nathanael’s ages, carrying in their hands a variety of fresh fruits and vegetables from the marketplace.

“There they are.” Taylor pointed towards the two children, and Nathanael glanced over his shoulder just as the chubby boy took notice of them and waved at them while the redhead was paying for the food.

“Hi, strangers!” Nathanael waved back as they approached them. “Hey, you need help carrying those, Mel?” he offered.

“No, thanks. I got it,” Mel replied. “How was work today?”

Nathanael groaned. “Exhausting.”

Taylor chuckled. “It’s been a day. We got a little slammed, but we got through it. One of them wasn’t too happy when Mom said we were closing early.” She opened her satchel, and took out two cream puffs folded up in individual cloths. “Here, Mom had some extra left over and said you both could use a treat.”

“That was nice of her,” Mel said, taking the cream puff with a smile on her freckled face.

“Yeah, Mrs. Schuyler really knows how to make the best desserts.” Sam smiled as he took the cream puff, and placed it into his bag. “I’ll save this one for later.” 

The four of them proceeded to stroll through Trost towards the direction of the inner gate as they discussed the ongoings of their week since they had last seen one another. Work at Windor Ranch has kept Mel especially busy, but she and her father have had a lot of extra help since she convinced her father to let Sam work with them. With food shortages increasing, business at the bakery was slightly going down even during rushes, however the Schuyler siblings were optimistic the shortage wouldn’t have too much of a negative effect on the business. 

As the two boys were droning on about the next expedition tomorrow, Taylor and Mel both drifted behind until Taylor stopped mid-sentence when something shiny caught her eye. Mel had come to a stop as well and looked over to see her friend admiring the displayed handcrafted jewelry displayed in a shop window.

“Mel, look at these!” Taylor said in awe. “They’re really pretty.”

Mel examined the jewelry on the display, admiring mostly the silver over the gold. “These really do look nice,” she agreed. “These look more authentic than the ones I saw in Sina.”

Taylor skimmed through the necklaces until her eyes fell upon a golden locket, slightly tarnished with age but a detailed engraving of the Wings of Freedom and floral pattern circling around the center.

“Ooooh,” she murmured.

“You like it?” the man behind the door asked.

Taylor and Mel both jumped a bit from the sudden voice, unsure how long he had been there for, but he wore a welcoming smile on his face.

Taylor tried to calm her beating heart and smiled back, then nodded. “Yes, sir,” she peeped in a soft tone.

“This old thing has been sitting here collecting dust for some time now. There aren’t many folk around here in favor of the scouts and their noble cause.” His smile halfened a bit as he looked down in pity at the necklace.

“My dad and uncle are in the scouts together,” Taylor said with more confidence. “My father is one of the best soldiers they’ve got. He even has his own squad unit.”

The shopkeeper smiled at the girl. “Well, I’ll tell you this, those two fellas are one of the bravest out there for what they and many others are doing, and you should be proud of them.”

“Oh, I am. I’m very proud of my daddy.” It was refreshing to see others who were supportive of the Survey Corps that didn’t believe these missions were a waste of their taxes and were reckless enough to venture outside when they knew there was a big world waiting to be discovered.

“How much for the locket?” Taylor asked.

“Forty euro.”

Taylor’s stomach jolted at the price.

“You think you have enough for that?” Mel asked.

“I think so.” Taylor contemplated: It had been awhile since she awarded herself with an expensive item after all. What’s the harm in it? She reached into her coat pocket and ended up taking out twenty euro, then scrambled into her other pocket and satchel until her friend stopped her.

“Here, I can take care of it.” Mel took out the other half of what was owed and handed it to the shopkeeper, ignoring Taylor’s dumbfounded expression.

“Mel, you don’t have to do that.”

“It’s fine, Tay. Really.” Mel smiled at her as she watched Taylor’s eyes light up before hesitantly taking the locket after the shopkeeper packaged it into some parchment, and Mel allowed him to keep whatever change was left.

“Here, ya go, love. It’s all yours.” 

“Thank you!” Tay excitedly took the necklace.

“And what about you, young lady? Is there anything you would like today?” the shopkeeper offered.

Mel shook her head. “Oh, no, thank you, sir,” she said politely.

“Ahh, I see it’s because you already have that gorgeous ring around your neck.”

“Yes, sir. It used to belong to my mother before she gave it to me.” Mel gently placed her hand on the silver ring that dangled around her neck.

“Quite a beauty, that is.”

“Mel? Tay?”

The two girls glanced over their shoulders when they heard their names being called in the crowd.

“We should start heading back,” Mel suggested.

Taylor nodded. “Thank you again, sir!”

“No, no, thank you! You two young ladies be safe out there now.” The shopkeeper smiled as he bid them a good day.

Taylor began to tear open the parchment and discard the leftover into her satchel, admiring the craftsmanship of the locket in her hand. “I can pay you back for the other half,” she offered.

“Mmmm...no,” Mel said.

Taylor glared at her. “Are we seriously gonna do this again?”

“Yep.” Mel gleefully smiled as stuck her tongue out.

“Could I pay you back in some leftover pastries?”

Mel pondered. “I’ll consider it.” 

Taylor chuckled. The chain of her new locket was long enough for her to put it on over her head as it dropped a few inches above her chest. She smiled as she admired the locket around her neck through the window they passed by.

Nathanael sighed in relief when the girls approached them, but scolded them. “Why is it that every time we turn our backs, you two just wander off all willy-nilly? I was worried you got snatched up.”

“We weren’t _that_ far off,” Mel explained, “and for the record I know how to defend myself.”

“Uh, she is right. Remember that time she beat up that kid who pulled her hair?” added Sam.

“Well, yeah, but…” Nathanael scratched the back of his head as he turned to Taylor, who was admiring her reflection in the window. But her smile fell when she noticed Nathanael didn’t finish his sentence. 

“But what?” she asked.

“Uh...it’s nothing.” Nathanael smiled at his friends. “Come on, we’d better get to Mel’s while we still have some time.”

“Yeah,” Taylor agreed softly. 

She figured she knew what her brother meant to say. She was already well-aware herself that she lacked the strength to defend herself should she find herself in any situation of danger. Sure, even if he meant no harm in it and was merely stating the obvious, it didn’t change the fact that it made her feel incompent in saying that.

~

The quadruple strolled along the path that took them to Windor Ranch, two acres of land owned by Dwight Oglethorpe in which he bred and tended to the horses that would be traded or sold into the military. Mel and Sam were passionate about taking care of the horses and loved them equally, and every once and a while Taylor and Nathanael were welcome to come down to help tend to the noble creatures. 

“How ya doing, big gal?” Nathanael blew in Sugar's nose, in which the horse responded by sneezing in his face at him. "Ohhh!" He wiped his face and adjusted his hat. “Yeah, thanks for that,” he muttered, in which she huffed back at him.

“Hi, Thunder.” Taylor gently placed her hand on Thunder's nose, and she huffed at her before she took her out of her stable.

Mel led her rambunctious horse Spirit out as Sam brough Clay by his side, him making sure to keep his distance from Spirit.

"Still can't believe you're the _only_ one that bastard will let ride him," Sam commented.

"That's because he loves only me," Mel said.

"I'd say he tolerates you."

As the two of them trotted off, Tay was having a hard time getting on Thunder’s saddle. She was taking up enough time that Thunder took it upon herself to chew some of the grass as her rider was slipping and sliding.

“Dang it…!” Tay gasped when she felt two hands on her waist before she felt herself be lifted off the ground easy enough to wrap her leg around Thunder's saddle.

"Thanks, Nathanael," she said.

"Any time." He flicked his hat before he jumped onto Sugar's saddle.

The group of friends spent the majority of that day riding the horses down the large acre of Windor Ranch. Like always, Mel and Spirit were ahead of them until Sam and Clay raced behind, wanting to take the lead. Nathanael took it easy with Sugar, just admiring the scenery of the field until Sugar decided to come to a stop for some grass to munch, much to Nathanael’s annoyance but he allowed it. Taylor felt tempted to make Thunder trot along at the same pace as Spirit and Clay, however it seemed too soon for her considering she was just now getting used to riding a horse. The ranch was the one place that felt very freeing for them and the one place they could just get away from the isolation of Trost and the walls surrounding them.

They reached the creek on the edge of the woods, their little "hide-out" and where they liked to unwind as they gave their horses a quick rest.

"How soon will your dad and uncle be coming?" Mel asked.

"Sometime later in the evening. They'll probably be coming over by the time Tay and I are back." Nathanael stretched his arms out as he laid comfortably on the grass, using his hat to shield his eyes from the sunlight. "Ma was able to get her hands on some beef for dinner. Tonight, we will be one of the best meals Ma is ever gonna cook." His mouth watered at the idea of eating some beef after so long of not consuming any meat.

"That's great you guys were able to get some meat," Mel said, stroking Clay's mane as he drank from the stream.

"Yeah, beef’s been hard to get some lately," Sam said. "Dad is saying there could be a hunger wave coming very soon if things don't change."

"That's what I'm worried about too. I just hope things will get better, especially for the bakery." Nathanael sat up and took the wheat out of his mouth. 

"Keeping the kids fed shouldn't be much of a problem when we sign up for the military," Taylor said, keeping her head buried in her journal as she doodled along the parchment. "At least they'll have plenty to eat for themselves while the camp provides food for us."

"Good point. And we'll be dining like kings." Sam's mouth watered as he thought about the succulent taste of beef. It had been a long time since he had ever had any kind of meat that wasn’t deer.

“Sign-ups for the next training corps will be beginning soon.” Nathanael stood up and looked at his friends. “Are we all still onboard with joining together like we’ve been talking about?”

“I’m hoping.” Sam’s face flustered a bit. “But I was told that because of my weight, I’d probably won’t be allowed to join the military.” 

Nathanael placed a hand on his shoulder. “I know you can do it, man. Don’t let that hold you back from chasing your dreams.”

“You really think the Garrison is gonna let someone like me work with them?”

“Hey, at least you and Mel would actually give a damn and not sit around drinking like those other guys.” Nathanae nudged his friend. “But are you sure that you still wouldn’t want to come into the scouts with us? We could use the extra teammate.”

Sam chuckled. “I think we've already made up our minds.” He nudged Nathanael back, then glanced at Mel as his cheeks turned a slight pink.

Mel sat down next to Taylor as she quietly drew. "Hey, didn’t you ever tell your parents about your training?" she asked.

Nathanael and Taylor both froze as their cheeks turned the same shade of red.

"Well...we just haven't had a chance to properly explain to them.” Nathanael took his hat off and spun it around in his hand. “But I know I have my mind set; the moment Tay and Mel turn twelve, we’re signing together. All of us.”

Taylor nodded. “Absolutely. I want to get a chance to see what’s on the other side.” Her green eyes widened in wonder. “What do you think will be there?”

“Titans,” Sam replied.

Nathanael snorted. “No shit. But there’s really no telling what it is on the other side.”

“Anywhere that’s more free than here,” Mel said, glancing up at the sky, glad to not be staring up at that same old wall. She sighed. "Maybe soon we can leave this stupid wall and not be cooped up all our lives. I mean, it's a dream to leave here." She stated without thinking.

“Melody!” Sam shouted, making sure her father nor any fellow villagers weren’t around. “It’s blasphemy to even think that. Remember that couple that tried to fly away in Wall Maria?”

“So?”

Nathanael laughed nervously. “That’s our Melody for ya, not giving a shit what the MP’s say. And she’s right, it’s bullshit for not even being a little curious. Plus the flying balloon is probably another dumb conspiracy theory.”

“Well I’m tired of not getting to see Daddy like we used to. We’ll all be fighting by his side and getting to see the world.” Taylor smiled pridefully as she finished the final touches of her sketch of the creek.

At sunset, the Schuyler siblings bid Sam and Mel goodbye as they made their way back to Trost.

“Something eating you, Tay?” Nathanael asked.

She shrugged. “Well...you think Daddy and Uncle Eli will be happy about us joining the scouts?”

Nathanael put his hands in his pockets and looked down. “Hmm...I doubt they’d be too thrilled about it. But it’s not like they can say or do much to change our minds.” He spread his arms out and walked next to the sidewalk of the river to keep his balance, his sister following suit. “And you know I’m not gonna force you to join only because I am, right?”

“I know.”

“Being in the military is gonna be a lot of hard work. A lot of people getting in your face and back-breaking training.”

Taylor sighed. “I know what I’m getting myself into, Nat. But this is something I want, too.” She jumped back into the grass. “But I’m worried how Mom is gonna handle twins and the store without us.”

“She has the nanny, plus she’s managed to take care of us when we were babies.” Nathanael patted her back. “Ma’s a lot tougher than we give her credit for. And we’re gonna make her proud.” 

They hurried back to the bakery when they realized it was getting later than they expected. Nathanael shoved the door open as the siblings rushed in with excitement. Their kitten Loki jumped in fright as they dashed up the second floor to the loft. The amorma of cooked beef and steamed vegetables filled their noses and made their mouths water. By the time they got to the loft, in the kitchen with their mother stood two men by her side. 

“DADDY!!!”

“PA!!!”

Dawson Schuyler stopped laughing at his friend’s joke and smiled as he crouched down with his arms wide open, ready to scoop them up in his arms. “Hey, you crazy kiddos!” He smiled as they both ran into his arms, almost knocking him over as they expressed their excitement to see him again.

“You two are late,” Miriam chimed in.

Nathanael nervously laughed. “Sorry, Ma...we got sidetracked at the ranch.”

“Oh, it’s no big deal, Miriam. They’re here now.” Dawson ruffled his son’s head to make his cap cover his eyes.

“Well, now that they’re here, they can wash up and finish preparing dinner.” She gave them a half smile with her eyebrow cocked as the kids agreed to help her.

"Hey, now. Don't I get a hug as well?" Their uncle stood up and opened his arms.

“Uncle Eli!”

The kids ran up to him as he kneeled down to wrap his arms around them. Even if they were not related by blood, they considered him a part of this family. “I’ll be damned, you two have gottin’ so big since I last saw y’all!” he cackled.

“Elijah,” Miriam muttered.

“Sorry ‘bout that. So used to talking like that ‘round our boys,” Elijah snickered as he sat back down and took another sip of his wine. 

“Well make sure you watch what you say so these two don’t start picking up on that dirty talk.” Dawson placed his hands on both Nathanael and Taylor’s heads. He leaned in towards them and dropped his voice to a whisper. “Just not in front of your mother.”

The kids giggled until they noticed Miriam standing over her husband. “I heard that,” she said, bonking him in the head with the spoon.

Dawson nervously smiled at her as he rubbed his head. “Did I ever tell you I love you, honey?”

That stupid humor and smile, she will never understood how easily she was so swept away by it. But it still was enough to make her chuckle even when she tried to hide it. “Just go wash up for dinner, you three.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

When the kids walked away, Dawson took a moment to hug his wife. After what would come tomorrow, the comfort of his wife was what he needed most in the world.

As the kids helped set the table and finished prepping the feast (even Dawson making Elijah get of his butt to help Miriam with the cleaning up), Dawson took the time to watch the twins and see how much they had grown; he couldn’t wait to see how much they would grow up, to see the bright future all four of them had ahead of them. He was hopeful this would be their generation to see the freedom he was fighting to give them.

In no time, their feast was ready: The dishes containing the deliciously cooked beef, steamed vegetables, mashed potatoes, and Miriam’s famous buttered biscuits. The Schuyler family sat around the dining room table, ready to engorge themselves in the food they hadn’t had a chance to eat in so long.

“Mmm, delicious as always, Miriam,” Dawson said as he bit into the meat. “I swear, the cooks at headquarters are never able to cook the way you do.”

Miriam blushed. “I just hope this will be enough for everybody. We tried to make do with what we could.”

“Oh, it’s more than enough, Miriam,” Elijah said as he finished off yet another glass of wine. “Another round, please.”

“I think that’s enough there, buddy.” Dawson lowered his hand.

“What do you think you’ll see this time when you leave tomorrow?” Nathanael asked suddenly.

Everyone at the table except for the twins ceased eating as they turned their heads towards the confused boy.

“Nathanael.” Miriam was prepared to scold him before Dawson raised his hand and shook his head.

“It’s all right, honey.” Dawson looked at his son and daughter. The twins were making a mess of their food as the two oldest listened in wonder. “There’s no telling what will happen tomorrow. It’s always a guessing game: We may find new information on the titans that could be beneficial, or for all we know we could lose a couple lives along the road, could be our closest friends...and as I hate to imagine, it could be me or Elijah that could fall victim next...”

A look of worry formed on his kids’ faces as Miriam turned her head away, not wanting to hear more.

“But one thing’s for sure—I have hope that we’re getting closer to achieving our freedom within the next few years. I just know it.”

Elijah sighed, breaking the silence. “You keep telling yourself that, Dawson,” he mumbled. “At the end of it all, we’ve still lost a lot of people out there. You may be optimistic, but I’m just bein’ realistic here. This ain’t to scare your kids, but we’re losing this fight. I’m starting to get convinced that we’re losing this fight.”

“That’s not true, Eli. We know much more than we did when we joined the scouts I know, we lost so many of our dear friends, but we’re so close to finding out where they came from and how to get rid of them...It won’t be long until we can finally claim the other side.”

Miriam gently touched her husband’s hand. “You really are the craziest man I have ever known.”

“And yet you’ve always supported me through the craziness.” Dawson smiled at his wife, making her smile back as her brown eyes watered.

Taylor was the first to get out of her seat and later Nathanael as they walked towards their father, and hugged him close. They could never be more proud to know that their father was fighting for the sake of humanity, to terminate those vicious beasts that forced them into these cages. 

“I can’t wait to go outside,” Nathanael murmured. “I want to know what it’s like on the other side.”

“Just like in those stories you talk about,” Taylor added.

Nathanael’s earlobes went red as he looked at her in shock.

“Stories?” Dawson smirked at his son.

“Yeah...it’s no biggie,” he chuckled. “I just tell them up to Tay and the twins to keep them entertained…and to keep Tay from having a bad dream and crying all night.”

Taylor stuck her tongue out at her smirking brother, making the adults and twins laugh. As they laughed, Dawson’s laughter faded as he looked around at his big family. He truly felt like one of the luckiest men on earth to have such a supportive wife, someone he considers a brother, and four kids that were his pride and joy. His true happiness.

“Daddy?” Taylor asked when she noticed he was tearing up.

“Yeah, baby?” 

“Are you all right, Pa?” Nathanael asked.

“Yeah. I’m fine.” Dawson wiped his green eyes, but his smile remained. “I’m just...so glad I got to see you guys before tomorrow!” He scooped his kids up in his arms, making them laugh as he walked over to the laughing twins and blew raspberries in the twins’ cheeks.

“And we are too, Pa!” Nathanae said. 

“You know whatever happens, I’ll always love you. No matter what.” Dawson embraced his family close. 

“We love you too, Dawson.” Miriam smiled as she hugged her husband and children, a tear running down her cheek. “We are all so proud of you and Elijah.”

Dawson opened his eyes and looked at his friend, who was drifting off to sleep.

“Eli, get in here.”

Elijah snored and woke up, then grumbled. “Dawson, you know I ain’t one for group hugs.”

“Get your ass in here, Eli.”

Miriam bopped her husband upside the head, but Elijah just laughed and got up to join his friends in a warm embrace.

~

“I was planning to hand these out in the morning, but I think you and your comrades could use a treat for the night." Miriam handed him the basket containing the baked goods she prepped in advance.

“Thank you, honey. The fellas will be happy to get a taste of your baking again. They told me to mention you’re one of the best bakers.” Dawson chuckled as he took the basket.

“Yeah, poor Commander Shadis has to sit through Dawson yammer on and on and on about how he loves his four little rascals and doting little wife,” Elijah stammered. “Nice things, of course.” 

“He’d better.” Miriam chuckled, then wrapped her arms around her husband. This was the part she hated the most. If only she could stop time to hold him for longer, she would. He tightened his warm hug, taking in her sweet scent from the shop that brought back so many memories of being with his family. They both wished they could have a little more time. “Be careful out there,” she whispered. 

“I will be,” Dawson tucked a strand of her strawberry brown hair behind her ear, and kissed her lips gently. 

When they released, Miriam turned towards Elijah as he leaned against the wall. “You make sure Dawson doesn’t do anything reckless in the front lines. Make sure to keep him in his place. That goes for you too, mister.”

Elijah chuckled. “Yes, ma’am. I’ll make sure to keep Dawson from getting his ass whooped by a titan.” He laughed as he hugged Miriam, patting her back. “We’ll be sure to come back safely.”

“You’d better. Both of you.”

Corine and Clovis whined as they both extended their hands up to him, and he lifted them not up. “You two, make sure to keep your big brother and sister out of trouble. Remind them of who’s the boss.” He blew raspberries in their cheeks as they roared with laughter. “Oh, I can’t wait to see you guys get bigger.” He handed the twins to Miriam, then kneeled down in front of the two oldest.

He rubbed Nathanael’s head. “Take care of the place while I’m gone, son. Keep doing what you’re doing.”

Nathanael sniffled, yet tried to remain strong for his father as he nodded. “Yes, sir. I’ll keep being the man of the house while you’re gone.”

“Atta boy.” Dawson smiled, then looked down to see Taylor’s shoulders moving as her head was down. “Hey, now, what’s this?”

Taylor lifted her up, then threw herself onto her father, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I wanna come with you...I hate it when you’re away for so long.”

“I know, baby, I know.” Dawson hugged his little daughter as she sobbed into his shoulder. “Tell ya what, baby girl. How about while I’m gone, you paint me a pretty picture that you can surprise me with when we come back. Can you do that for me?”

Taylor pouted her lips, but she nodded her head.

“I can’t wait to see it.” Dawson kissed her forehead. “My little artiste.”

“You rascals stay out of trouble now.” Elijah ruffled their heads. “C’mon, Dawson, we’d better get back before Shadis throws a fit for bein’ late.”

“Say bye-bye, Daddy,” Miriam told the twins. 

Corine and Clovis waved their little hands to their father as they both got into the carriages that would take them back to HQ. The Schuyler family stayed outside as they watched it disappear into the night.

When they entered, Nathanael helped Miriam put the twins to bed as Taylor quietly wandered down the corridor.

“Ma? Are you all right?” Nathanael asked.

She sighed. “Yes, I am. I’m sorry. It’s just been...I'm a little worried about what could happen to either of them,” her voice shook as she held back tears.

"Hey." Nathanael approached his mother to provide her comfort. "It's okay. I’ve been scared too, but they’ll be okay. You'll see."

Taylor stood in the hallway as she listened to her brother's assurance. He had been saying that for years. Their dad had been in the military since before they were born. He was rarely home from the start, and she admittedly wished he was around more. Her heart ached whenever she would see many customers in full families—a father, mother, siblings or only child—come in and see how happy they were together. It was something she wished she could have herself.

She went into her room and closed the door, then laid in bed as she cried quietly into her pillow until she heard a knock. "Nobody's here," she mumbled under the blankets.

The door still opened as someone walked in. "Well can she take a message?" Nathanael lifted the blanket and sat down at the edge of her bed. "I know how you feel, Tay. I miss them too."

"I just wish he was around more often," Taylor murmured. "What if this time is the last time Uncle Eli and Daddy come—"

"Hey! Don't say—"

"Shh! You'll wake the twins," Taylor whispered.

Nathanael sighed, but dropped his voice to a whisper. "Don't say that," he said. "Pa has one of the best squads, very few of his soldiers were killed on his watch and he currently has the most titan kills."

"But they still do die out there." She rubbed her fingers along the leather of her journal. "You heard about the shoemaker's wife...She got both her arms torn off, bled to death before she..." Taylor felt sick as she tried her hardest not to imagine the gruesome sight.

Nathanael patted her back. "I know...I hate those monsters more than anything. But they promised they would survive. But remember when you turn twelve, we're still signing up for the corps together, and just think we'll be by their side all the time! We won't have to be cooped up behind the walls for so long."

Taylor sniffled and rubbed her runny nose.

"They'll be no match for us when we go up against them. The four of us, together." Nathanael held his pinky finger up towards his sister. "Just a couple years, okay? We'll be strong enough and be fighting by Pa and Uncle Elijah's side in no time."

Nathanael was always so much more confident and sure of things. And Taylor admired that he was much wiser than she could have ever believed. She wrapped her pinky finger along his.

"Who knows? You might grow a couple more inches when you begin your training." Nathanael poked Taylor's stomach, making her giggle.

"Do you really think we will get to see the whole world when they're all finally dead?" Taylor asked, looking up at the moon.

"Maybe. That's what I like to think. I just hope it won't be underwhelming, but it has to be better than living in the walls our whole life." Nathanael looked up at the shining full moon.

"Or maybe we can try to understand where they came from, why they're here and why they eat people."

Nathanael glared down at the floor. She knew what he was thinking. He wanted to understand them too, why they were here, but over the years he's come to the conclusion they were here just to eat. To kill them. To wipe every human from existence.

"Maybe...I don't know...we know a little more about them, but not enough to know why they target us." He looked up at the night sky. "I just want to go outside, not have to live in fear of those things."

"Do you think the world will be like you said in your stories?" 

"Oh, I sure hope so. Or maybe something similar. But one day, we're gonna get out of here and see that for ourselves."

Later that night, Taylor snuggled up in her bed, her kitten Loki purring softly, as she flipped through the scribbled artwork she had drawn over the recent months, and that night went to bed dreaming of victory and finally getting their chance to explore the world.

~

That night only felt like it was only yesterday. Hard to believe it was only two months ago. So full of hope. 

Nathanael stared up at the ceiling as he laid motionless in his bed. Time was going on very slowly for him. Unable to shut his eyes, he sat up and forced himself out of bed, taking only a candle with him as he aimlessly wandered down the dark hallway illuminated by the moonlight. Miriam had finally gotten the rest she needed; or perhaps much like he was, she was laying wide awake unable to rest but unmotivated to get up. He held his candle as he made his way down to the second floor.

As he had expected, Taylor was once again sleeping on the floor of the sitting room. Her journal laid wide open while her pencil looked as though it had rolled across the floor when she fell asleep. He lifted his candle slightly, where pinned on the wall was the last thing that was Dawson’s cloak. Miriam had managed to wash out the blood that remained, and there was only so much repairing she could muster. Nathanael still ached at the sight of the cloak, finding it hard to believe it had only been two months since what happened. 

He kneeled down and shook his sister awake. “Tay,” he whispered. “Wake up.”

Taylor mumbled in her sleep till she woke up. From the lumination of the candle, there were dried tears on her face, and her eyes were reddened as well as black circles. 

“What’re you doing down here?” Nathanael asked.

Taylor looked down at the sketch of her father. “I thought if I drew him, I wouldn’t forget what he looked like,” she mumbled. “Just like he wanted

Nathanael looked at the artwork, but he picked up the journal and closed it. “Come on. You need to sleep in your own bed.” He helped her off the floor, and led her back up to the third floor, being careful not to wake the twins as they passed by to her room. 

“Are you still going to join the scouts?” Taylor finally asked when Nathanael pulled the covers over her.

He tensed up, then looked down. “I don’t think we can afford to lose anyone else...It’s too risky.” He moved out of the way to allow Loki to jump onto the bed and give Taylor comfort. “Maybe it’s for the best we put all that on hold.”

And with that, Nathanael blew out the candle and bid himself off into his own room where the Schuyler family would spend another sleepless night.

**Author's Note:**

> Attack on Titan/Shingeki no Kyojin is interally owned by Hajime Isayama and Kodansha. I claim no ownership to the source material besides my OCs made specfically for this fanfiction.


End file.
